Okay, coming in for round five of six may not be quite as sexy as spending time with Seven of Nine, but it isn’t without its perks today. For one, check out today’s accommodations! I may have to squeeze in a nap, just to take advantage.

Plus, apparently I have managed to gain ten pounds over the past month or so, perplexing the medical staff who are now curious about my diet and exercise… Let’s just say, it hasn’t been my exercise, and maybe that is part of it.

The good news for me is that I appear to be in generally good physical shape. My blood work continues to show that I have proper levels of everything. In spite of a general lethargy, things sound good through a stethoscope and look good overall. In short I would pass a physical exam with no problems. Of course, this is an issue with cancer detection in general. I know that the lethargy is the result of the chemotherapy. The rather mild shortness of breath that I experience now as opposed to the shortness of breath I experienced 6 months ago is most likely related to the  lethargy from the chemo. The lethargy I have now would not be an issue with a normal physical if I was not undergoing treatment, so I would be branded, even with my (personally) elevated blood pressure as being in better than average health. Funny, that. But good news for me, anyway, and a clear sign that I am continuing to respond well.

It does occur to me that yet again I have forgotten to address the issue of increased floaters in my eyes, but eventually I will get around to it. Probably more related to age than my treatment, and clearly won’t be that big of an issue in the grand scheme of things. But I am always curious.

Curiosity is one of those things that continues to drive me. In another six weeks I will be starting a maintenance regimen to replace my current chemo cocktail. It is up in the air at this moment whether I will be sticking on one chemo medicine that disrupts the metabolic activity of cells or I stay on a drug to prevent the growth of new blood vessels. Either way, I will cease to take the one chemotherapy drug that messes up the DNA of new cells. That particular drug apparently is only proven to work through six cycles, and therefore would be pointless to continue.

I also know that a new clinical trial is starting up for the PD 1 immunotherapy treatments. So if I stop responding to the chemo I am currently taking, this becomes an option. Of course I expect that I will continue to respond positively to the current therapies. And ideally the PD 1 treatment will become commercially available and I will be able to get it without having any setbacks to make it possible.

Getting all the details is always useful for me, as long as they are understandable. This is one of the reasons that the Internet can be so detrimental. Having extended chats with my oncologist is most beneficial. Working with an educated and responsive medical team is invaluable. And knowing how to vet what you read prior to jumping to conclusions is also invaluable.

My personal history with vetting facts and information has helped me profoundly.  My years working with 3rdparty.org prepared me well for not taking things I read at face value, especially claims from people who are not experts in their field or who have something to gain by selling you on their idea, or worse, are motivated by ideology.

In the cancer info blogosphere, it seems that often ideology rules. Red flags must be raised whenever this is clearly the case. One might argue that sites suggesting the importance of science are also ruled by a certain ideology. The difference here is whether that ideology is evidence based or not. In the case of real science it always is, just by definition. Of course, ideology is most dangerous when it treads the ground of dogma.

This is not to say that I automatically write off every alternative that is presented. I try to keep a very open mind, and seek out an understanding of the underlying theory behind any alternative that seems to make sense. The problem I usually find is that these alternatives only seem to make sense and once the underlying theory is fully understood, it no longer holds water in actual practice. If such alternatives could show enough evidence for their effectiveness, they would, after all, become excepted medicine.

For full disclosure, my blog is ideologically motivated. I believe strongly in Sense and Reason. I also believe strongly in Logic. These are things that I understand and am committed to pursue, in congress with my personal desire to lead a spiritually evolved life. I do not see that there is a conflict of interest between these things, any more than I see that there is a need to subscribe to any particular dogmatic belief system in order to be a spiritual person (and I will argue that dogma actually inhibits spiritual growth). Keeping an open mind and pursuing out-of-the-box solutions is always healthy when grounded in reason. Taking a leap of faith is sometimes necessary, especially when there is evidence or logic underlying the decision. But in the end, nothing trumps knowledge.

And so I continue to pursue the truth of my situation. It won’t be the same truth as everyone else’s, for we all have our personal truths to contend with. The world, after all, means different things to different people and it would be a far less interesting place if we all saw the same thing all of the time.