Tag Archives: positive approach

Death, Rebirth, Living On

April 17, 2017Cancer, Health and WellnessCancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, Death, Dying, Education, end of civilization, Health, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, Science, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

Brightly colored (and not colored) eggs. — Even the most brightly colored eggs will sometimes reveal their cracks.

Yesterday was Easter. Today I am in the chair at the infusion center, watching a steady drip work its way into my arm. At some point over the next few days I will likely be scheduling an “exit interview” with a friend who is going to die from his cancer within the coming weeks. There is an interesting, perhaps timely mix of metaphor in all this. The holiday, for those who celebrate its religious significance, is about spiritual rebirth (and literal rebirth for the more fundamentalist among us). I look at these chemicals entering my bloodstream right now as agents of my own rebirth, my second chance at life for as long as it may last, a chance to try and get some things right while I am here. And my friend’s impending death is a reminder that, even with the best of science and consistent faith, these days do come to an end for us all, whether we are ready or not.

Michael March as been, as far as I can tell, a solid Christian and a man of reason. He chose to evaluate all available treatment options, pursuing even the difficult ones when they offered a clear explanation of potential outcomes backed by decades of studies and documented successes. For eight years, he has dealt with various cancers, outliving each prognosis because of committing to his treatments. But at each stage, from diagnosis to remission to reoccurrence, he has been forced to examine his own mortality and come to peace with the idea that he may not see another birthday or Christmas or, as is now the case, another Easter. This was his final celebration of his faith’s Resurrection Story. For Michael, there is a definite end to this existence as we know it, and he is facing it with the determination of ensuring a positive legacy. Continue reading Death, Rebirth, Living On →

The Cancer Sufferer’s Wife

April 8, 2017Cancer, Health and Wellness, ReasonBlogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, Education, Fear, Health, language, Lung Cancer, paranoia, Politics, positive approach, Positivity, Reason, Science, Sense, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

Through the wonder that is Social Media, I’ve connected to a wide range of people with their own personal cancer stories. As an extension to this blog, and as part of the research for both a broader understanding of the treatment options out there in the big, wide world, and the book I have been slowly developing to help guide future patients and caregivers through this often difficult and confusing process, I have been collecting interviews from a growing pool of diverse perspectives. Most of these interviews end up in my Patreon feed, where my podcast/video blog has its official home.

One of my recent acquaintances was the wonderful Lizz, who writes a lively blog called The Drop Off, which recently acquired the subtitle of “TRAVERSING THE INCURABLE, HELP AND HUMOUR FROM A CANCER SUFFERS WIFE.”

This subtle change under the title of her blog was a point addressed in our lengthy conversation via Skype. Continue reading The Cancer Sufferer’s Wife →

Death, Death and More Death, Naturally

March 27, 2017Cancer, Fear, Health and Wellnessadenocarcinoma, Blogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, communication, Education, Fear, Health, language, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, Reason, Sense, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

My mother had recently received news about five friends and relatives dying within a four-day period. It seemed really stacked up, and then she got a call that her last remaining uncle was going into hospice care. While it would be another couple of days until he died, the early warning essentially brought the total news to six in under a week. Granted, she is “of a certain age” at which it is expected that her peers and associates will be ending this existence at an increased rate, especially those markedly older than herself. It happens. It’s a part of life. And it isn’t talked about enough.

As a culture, death makes us squeamish. It’s hushed up, spoken of mainly with euphemisms and generally avoided for its awkwardness. Worse, it is often treated as an embarrassment. Oh, why did Grandad have to die so…inconveniently? Perhaps he should have just gone on vacation and disappeared… “I’m sorry for your loss,” they all say, pitying you for being unable to arrange a cleaner exit for the dearly departed. But death is messy, sometimes. Death brings hurt, upends the cozy lives of the living, leaves an overwhelming amount of loose ends.

But death is a natural part of life — one that cancer patients often have staring at them right over the proverbial shoulder. In February, I interviewed Michael March about his, as he put it, “Final Journey.” Michael is dying from throat cancer that migrated to his lungs, after eight years of dealing with various cancer issues (including periods of remission). Our conversation ran the gamut, from the lack of education that people have in talking about death to the spiritual comfort some seek during their period of decline. Michael also opened up about the fear of suffering that still remains after having made peace with the idea of dying. Continue reading Death, Death and More Death, Naturally →

Looking Back at the Week Ahead

February 26, 2017Cancer, Health and WellnessBlogs, Cancer, chemo diaries, communication, Education, Fear, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, Reason, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

Once in a while, I feel like it’s appropriate to update my meager readership on what is going on that is relevant to this blog and my other work, as well as recapping incidental anecdotes about life in general. Such is the justification for this post. Plus, I thought it might be nice to write something short after that last one… And since my next planned post is already proving to be a bit on the longer side, I’m looking at this like a small snack break between meals. (Well, comparatively small, anyway — I’m actually something of a heavy snacker most days.)

Living with cancer has, of course, its own set of challenges. Even if the cancer is well maintained, even if the response to treatment is going well, it complicates life in ways both predictable and unexpected on an ongoing basis. It adds stresses that might otherwise never present themselves. For example, for the past two years, every time I have a headache, no matter how small, it makes me question whether that is a sign of a brain lesion, some new metastases that had gone unnoticed, a harbinger of (for me) yet uncharted radiotherapy treatments or a potential ticking time bomb. And time, always, is on my mind, an urgency there underlying everything that I do; time is a limited resource and there isn’t a day that I’m not reminded of this. Continue reading Looking Back at the Week Ahead →

6 Simple Guidelines for Political Posts on Social Media

February 1, 2017Politics, ReasonAnti-Intellectualism, communication, Education, end of civilization, Fear, journalism, language, Lies, misinformation, Politics, positive approach, PositivityJeffrey Poehlmann

I just put about two weeks’ worth of coffee into my body, so please consider that as you read these proposed guidelines for political postings on social media.

I decided to put these down because I have noticed so many friends falling off toward these two camps: those who are tuning out completely due to political news fatigue and those who are spun up into a frenzy of posting and reposting and forwarding and generally being outraged all the time (or at least every fifteen minutes between the odd stress-reducing cute animal pic or positivity meme).

Follow this link to www.justbadforyou.com/blog — http://jeffreypoehlmann.rocks

The fact is, neither approach is helpful, and probably not healthy, either. We should all remain engaged, after all, or at least aware of what is going on around us. But we should not get lost in the process, nor should we be a part of the system of misinformation that has plagued our national politics for a long, long time. (That’s right, it is almost a national treasure, this “fake news” thing, and it goes right back to the beginning of our country’s history. That it appears to have reached some new apex in the past year is something of a natural progression, albeit a sad one. The challenge now is for the media to really keep it in check as it had done, more or less, for the past 120-ish years since the Hearst-induced Spanish-American War.)

6 Really Useful Social Media Guidelines

Continue reading 6 Simple Guidelines for Political Posts on Social Media →

Luck and Attention

January 19, 2017Cancer, Health and WellnessBlogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, communication, Education, Fear, Health, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, Science, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

I recently had the good fortune of interviewing a long-time friend and fellow Stage 4 cancer patient for my podcast, The Deep Breath. Usually, the podcast is just me running off at the mouth, dispensing my heavily biased advice or addressing questions that have come up in one way or another. Sometimes I just talk about my personal experience. My best (or at least my own favorite) recordings are those in which I interview someone with a different perspective than my own or from whom I can learn something interesting. This one was different, though, and required a different treatment.

When I think of Mike, I always imagine him as he was in high school. That is mostly due to the fact that I’ve only seen him a scant handful of times over the past 30 years, and none of those were particularly recent. We have stayed in contact primarily because of social media, both of us being part of a wide group of shared friends who have remained more or less civil toward one another even as we have spread apart geographically, politically and, outside of these virtual networks, socially. His story began to intertwine more tightly with my own about a year ago when he announced on Facebook that he had been diagnosed with colon cancer and was about to embark upon an uncertain course of treatment with chemotherapy. Continue reading Luck and Attention →

Is This What Dying Feels Like?

January 9, 2017Cancer, Health and WellnessBlogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, communication, Fear, Health, positive approach, Positivity, Reason, toxins, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

As a cancer patient on regular rounds of chemotherapy, this is a question that I have often asked myself. When I look in the mirror and see a body that I don’t recognize and the effects of the drugs on my brain have me under a heavy fog of malaise, it is easy to drop into the trap of defeatism. I have stared into my own eyes, wondering what had become of their prior yearning or that sly glint I imagined they used to have, and asked the mirror if this is what it feels like to die. To waste away into a reflection of what I was. To effectively disappear from the world, slowly, margin by margin, breath by breath. Continue reading Is This What Dying Feels Like? →

The Chemo Diaries: Year 3 Begins!

December 13, 2016Cancer, Health and Wellness, Politics, Reasonadenocarcinoma, Blogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, communication, conservative, Education, end of civilization, Health, Lung Cancer, Politics, positive approach, Positivity, Reason, Sense, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

December 2014 marked the beginning of my chemotherapy, and two full years are now complete. This already puts me well beyond the “statistical expectation” for continuing to kick around, allowing me to enjoy another holiday season with my family and, for better or worse, getting me closer to my goal of actually going back to work full-time at some point in the (hopefully not too distant) future. A third year on chemotherapy may have seemed like a remote option at one point, something that was a distant hope not to be taken for granted, but now is an accepted part of my ongoing plan, the “new normal” that has been often talked about, what I have simply become quite used to in my daily existence.

Me walking around Disneyland with pneumonia while celebrating the results of my most recent CT scan.

So I take a moment to sit in my gratitude for what modern medical science has afforded me. As I write this, I am one day past my infusion, feeling only moderately tired because I woke at 3:30am and was unable to get back to sleep due to the way my steroids get my brain spinning in the night. Ironically, that same effect does not seem to occur during the day, when my mental capacities tend more toward fatigue and fog as the hours progress. Chalk that incongruity up to sleep deprivation, I suppose. The good news is that the steroids will have mostly worn off by tonight and, with any luck, I’ll be back to sleeping — or at least being able to go back to sleep — mostly through the night.

And yes, I went on plenty of rides. Can’t get me enough of those perilous romps through neon storybooks.

A month or two ago, I had a discussion with my oncologist about how I felt fewer side effects from the chemo, as though it had become progressively easier for me to tolerate over the past year, and especially over recent months. It gave him pause because, he informed me, the body does not generally “learn” to process the chemotherapy drugs more efficiently and patients do not build up a tolerance to the chemicals. If that were happening, for whatever reason, it might indicate that the drugs would no longer work due to being processed out of the system too rapidly. My most recent scan, taken last month, clearly indicated that the chemotherapy is still working the same that it had been — so obviously the infusions are effective at doing what they are supposed to be doing. The observation that I am left with, then, is that most likely I am simply used to dealing with the symptoms to a greater degree. Drilling down a bit more, however, there have been a few changes made in my routine after the infusion, specifically trying to be more active even on my more difficult days. My oncologist confirmed that this approach was most likely responsible for how I am “recovering more quickly” than I had been earlier in my treatment. Continue reading The Chemo Diaries: Year 3 Begins! →

The Downside to Cancer

December 10, 2016Cancer, Health and WellnessBlogs, Cancer, Chemotherapy, Humor, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

It’s hard these days to get away from the media barrage about all the perks a patient or caregiver gets out of a cancer diagnosis. Heck, with all the promised government handouts, it seems like everyone is going to want to get in on the action. But it is important to realize, in spite of all the hype to the contrary, that there is, in fact, a downside to cancer.

Why You May Want To Avoid Cancer

It’s true that easy access to handicapped parking can make life a lot easier, and a significant progression of disease is a sure-fire way to qualify for fancy license plates or those special passes you can hang from your rearview mirror. Some cancer diagnoses are practically like getting free money thanks to liberal disability benefits. But did you know that to take advantage of these special opportunities, a patient is required to spend literally hours of his or her personal time filling out paperwork? As if it weren’t bad enough dealing with the required documents and dancing through flimsy strands of red tape, the patient must also keep payroll records, IRS forms, and proof of the medical condition. Warning: if you hate paperwork and record-keeping, cancer may not be for you!

Lying back in the chair for a chemotherapy infusion. — Settling in for a long winter’s nap.

While we are on the topic of busy work, it is probably important to mention other ways in which cancer can suck your time away. Treatment is time-consuming. While this well-kept secret is the shame of the medical community, it is undeniable that doctors, clinics and pharmaceutical companies have conspired to generate lots and lots of billable hours in the form of repeated scans, surgeries that require lengthy hospital stays, and infusions that can take up to ten hours at a time — and then have to be repeated over and over again. This doesn’t even touch on going in for biopsies, radiotherapy or any of the ancillary tests that might be required to “ensure a complete understanding” of a patient’s condition. Warning: if you have other things you’d rather do with your time, cancer may not be for you! Continue reading The Downside to Cancer →

The Chemo Diaries Year 2 Wrap Up Audio Edition!

November 22, 2016Cancer, Health and Wellnessadenocarcinoma, Blogs, body, Cancer, chemo diaries, Chemotherapy, Health, Lung Cancer, positive approach, Positivity, wellnessJeffrey Poehlmann

This is an excerpt of my podcast, The Deep Breath. To hear the full 24 glorious minutes, including the explanation for my especially raspy voice (hint, it isn’t because of the cancer), please follow this link to my Patreon Page that hosts the podcasts. In celebration of Thanksgiving and the upcoming completion of 24 months of chemotherapy (there does seem to be a theme to the numbers here), this episode is completely free to listen to even if you are not yet one of my subscribers and patrons of this site.

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Just Bad for You

Saving you from yourself